I’m not at the point in my entrepreneurial journey where I can take time off for bereavement. It’s me, myself, and I behind the keyboard so taking time off to grieve over the loss of my father, and later my mother, wasn’t really an option. I still needed to show up for it all, including homeschooling our children and running my business. If you’re grieving and trying to do all.the.things, here are five ways I managed emotions and exhaustion while mourning. Maybe they’ll help you (or a friend) too. 1. Everyday is different. Accept that and don't beat yourself up about it. Each day you’ll feel different in your grief. Pick one thing to complete on your to-do list each day and focus on that. Multi-tasking is for computers. 2. Everyone handles grief differently. Skip the comparison game. It’s not healthy when you’re not mourning so let’s not even go down that road while you’re grieving. Stay in your lane and put the blinders on. 3. Extra self-care is necessary. Schedule it. If you find you need a nap in the afternoon, take it. If you find you need to dial back your usual networking, there’s no shame. You’re better off taking the time now than burning yourself out later. 4. Enforce boundaries. No is a complete sentence but if you feel the need to elaborate, simply be honest. You don’t have to give all the details but enough so the other person understands you need time and or space. 5. Pray. Pray for and to your loved one. My faith teaches that we need to pray for the souls of the dead. While there is a debate amongst theologians if these holy souls can also intercede for us, this doesn't stop you from paying. What a gift of giving and receiving, take comfort. Eternal rest grant unto them, O Lord,
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I have decided to give you a little sneak peek into my weekly mentoring call with Tom Ziglar. Each week we go over one spoke on the wheel of life, here is a great tip for your “personal” spoke. This is a simple and practical list of choices and habits that will give you a much needed energy boost. If you are feeling drained between work, teaching your children, and all the things that are part of your usual everyday routine you can choose to rest, reset or quit.
Instead of quitting and starting all over again, try to rest and reset with some of these... 20 choices and habits that will give you energy 1. Choose to care for yourself How can you help others if you don’t take care of yourself? There are many forms of self care from physical to spiritual to financial... 2. Develop a "habitude" of gratitude Fear and gratitude can’t live in the same place. So make sure you’re finding at least three things to be grateful each day. This simple exercise is even more powerful when you write those three things down. 3. Intentionally learn something you can share that will help someone else Serve someone! You’ll help another person and improve your outlook on life... 4. Find a hobby Don’t forget to have fun! Comes in handy with #13 too. 5. Plan think time Get up and own the day before it owns you or set aside some time during your lunch break 6. Plan to worry If something is pressing on you and you’re finding it hard to focus, schedule a time to worry! When the thought comes, make a note that you’ll take the time to worry about that at 10am. You’ll probably find that when that when 10 rolls around you won’t need to sit and “worry”. 7. Plan in advance how you will respond to life’s upsets Life happens and even the best laid plans will get interrupted with family emergencies or job changes. But you are in control of how you react - will you fly off the handle or take the change step by step and ask for help or delegate? 8. Start your day right It usually starts the night before with #11. Here’s a simple morning routine for you - it’s my focused 30. 9. Write “I like because…” notes and make a victory list. “I like” notes are a lot of fun to share with your family and co-workers. And don’t forget to celebrate your wins, big or small, at the end of each week. 10. Text some love and appreciation When you think of someone, go ahead and tell them! Chances are they need to hear it. 11. Sleep The amount of sleep you get determines your performance, mood, and even your weight. Get a solid 7-8 hours! (Moms, resist the urge to stay up and go “mom”-bie at night, you’re better off working on #8.) 12. Make sure you are not whining to yourself ‘Nuff said. 13. Paint a fence Stuck on something? Do a chore or a project unrelated to what you’re stuck on and disconnect for a while. 14. Walk in the woods Or the beach - go outside! Get some fresh air and enjoy God’s creation. Plus, sunshine helps your body produce its own Vitamin D which boosts your immune system. 15. Take short exercise breaks Take a break from sitting and stay flexible. 16. Intentionally daydream I had a coach tell me to just sit and look at my vision board daily - you know what? It’s fun and improved my mindset! 17. Learn a word a day And if you have children, have them quiz you on the spelling and definition. They'll learn something too. 18. Create your playlist I’ve got my library on YouTube. When I need a pick me up, I just pop in the earbuds or turn it on while I’m driving. 19. Get out of town Sometimes you just need a change of scenery to get some perspective 20. Putting it all together - the power of multiplication Combine some of these - for example, exercise outside while you listen to your playlist When one area of your life improves, all areas of your life improve. Which one of these choices will you implement this week? Are you craving self-care or are you intentional and scheduling it? You've heard the phrase: you can't pour from an empty cup. In other words, how can we expect to give our best to our family and career if we can't even give the best to ourselves? Here are two important steps I took to build self-care into my day, which helped me level up my mindset, health, and, yes, my work.
To shower or not shower... I remember chatting with a group of moms not too long ago and most of them said they didn't take time to wash their face daily. If you're a mom, especially of littles, you're probably nodding your head "yes" right now. Taking care of my skin is now an important part of my day, it rejuvenates me and boosts my confidence, but when our boys were babes I felt I was lucky if I got to take a shower. Should we be lucky to take a shower? If you can't find a little bit of time to take shower, then, please, sit down with a pen and paper and write a timeline of your day - great tip from Marie Forleo's book, Everything is Figureoutable. Yup, actually write down how long it takes you to do what you normally do... including scrolling on social media - eye opener! My guess is you'll find some things you can cut out completely, cut back on, or, dare I say it, ask for help with... You've created more time, now what? Now that you've found more time, take a closer look at batch working. It is NOT multitasking. Doesn't it make sense that you'd be more productive if you followed through on a task to its completion before moving on to the next thing? If you want to know more about it, listen to Jenna Kutcher's Goal Digger Podcast on this topic. Batch working has helped me organize my week. I have power hours four times a week and themes for each day so that if the unexpected comes up or the boys need more attention, at least I know to pick up where I left off. Let's assume you have trimmed down your daily routine and laid out your batch working schedule. What will you do with this precious time you've discovered? (Mamas, resist the urge to empty the dishwasher - don't be afraid to delegate, again, more time!) Is there a goal on your list that you're not taking action on because you keep telling yourself there is no time? Time to take action. Do you want to travel but you have no idea how much your dream trip will cost or when it will happen? Time to make a plan and stick to it. Or is it just a good time to sit and sip tea in the sun? (Yup, I love that.) Hey, even Jesus created alone time (Mark 1:35)! Start NOW! Self-care is your fuel so schedule it into your day. If you're like me, you'll find that you're better at all the roles in your life because you're fueling yourself up first. Remember what they tell you on an airplane, put your oxygen mask on first, then help the person next to you. |
AuthorI coach you to transform your life one simple choice at a time! I'm a proud boymom and licensed Ziglar Life Coach. Tea, big earrings, living a non toxic lifestyle, and creative evangelization are some of my loves... Archives
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